I am EXHAUSTED. I don't know if its from my new work out routine or what but I am so freaking tired. Which sucks because I got virtually no work done this weekend.
Day Three Feeling: Too Tired To Function
Monday, March 4, 2013
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Day Two
Day two! I've been guzzeling water and peeing like you would not ever believe. I know its only day two, but I'm already getting really dry. That probably must be winter though right?
I keep looking at girls with really good skin and thinking "Mine is going to look like that. It is. I know it." But four months feels sooo far away. I want instant feedback, like many people. I'm ready for this to be all over. I've been ready for a while.
I don't know how to balance between using moisturizers and having oily skin. Any lotion that actually does anything makes my face shine like a Chirstmas tree. Even then, it's still pretty dry.
I don't think my mom likes the idea of me being on this drug. She would rather cough up the money and have me get lazer treatment than be on Accutane. I trust my dermatologist more than her though since she tends to get all of her information off of the internet on one random site she found.
Day Two Feeling: Impatient
I keep looking at girls with really good skin and thinking "Mine is going to look like that. It is. I know it." But four months feels sooo far away. I want instant feedback, like many people. I'm ready for this to be all over. I've been ready for a while.
I don't know how to balance between using moisturizers and having oily skin. Any lotion that actually does anything makes my face shine like a Chirstmas tree. Even then, it's still pretty dry.
I don't think my mom likes the idea of me being on this drug. She would rather cough up the money and have me get lazer treatment than be on Accutane. I trust my dermatologist more than her though since she tends to get all of her information off of the internet on one random site she found.
Day Two Feeling: Impatient
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Day One
It's day one and I must admit I am slightly terrified. It probably hasn't helped that I have spent all morning looking on the internet at the horrible side effects. I'm most concerned about the dry skin since I already know that I am prone to that. That is why I freaking hate my acne so much. How unfair is it that I have both dry skin and acne? I can't wash away excess oil because my acne comes from underneath. Drives me absolutely crazy.
It's something that someone who has never had severe acne will never understand. It takes over your life. Thinking about which daily wash medicines to use, should you use cover up or will that make it worse, trying not to stress about it but you can't help it. Avoiding mirrors, florescent lighting, natural lighting, getting your picture taken, and standing too close to people. Getting all excited when the dermatologist offers up a new medicine and the crushing disappointment when it does nothing, just like all of the rest. The comments by your parents who want to help but also blame you in a way. "Stop touching it. Are you washing every day? Did you remember your medicine?" Trying all of the crazy things you read on the internet. "Put a towel over your pillow as you sleep. Avoid coffee. Run every day. Wash your face as soon as your done working out. Eat fish." I'm sure some of these work for some, but not for me.
I truly believe that the only thing that has been keeping me from being more outgoing has been my acne. 10 years of it now. Started when I was 12 and now I'm 22. I cried on my Birthday when I realized it had been 10 years. That's what finally did me in. I was sitting waiting for the dermatologist when I just burst into tears. It was enough. Time for something drastic. My poor doctor was caught a little off guard but I was grateful he took me seriously.
I worry that my boyfriend won't be able to deal with the worse before it gets better thing. Also the mood swings that some go through. He is very chill and has little stressers in his life which can be great, but I worry he is not going to know how to react.
I'm trying to prepare for the dryness now. Lots of moisturizers, water, and lip balm!
Day One Feeling: Anxious
It's something that someone who has never had severe acne will never understand. It takes over your life. Thinking about which daily wash medicines to use, should you use cover up or will that make it worse, trying not to stress about it but you can't help it. Avoiding mirrors, florescent lighting, natural lighting, getting your picture taken, and standing too close to people. Getting all excited when the dermatologist offers up a new medicine and the crushing disappointment when it does nothing, just like all of the rest. The comments by your parents who want to help but also blame you in a way. "Stop touching it. Are you washing every day? Did you remember your medicine?" Trying all of the crazy things you read on the internet. "Put a towel over your pillow as you sleep. Avoid coffee. Run every day. Wash your face as soon as your done working out. Eat fish." I'm sure some of these work for some, but not for me.
I truly believe that the only thing that has been keeping me from being more outgoing has been my acne. 10 years of it now. Started when I was 12 and now I'm 22. I cried on my Birthday when I realized it had been 10 years. That's what finally did me in. I was sitting waiting for the dermatologist when I just burst into tears. It was enough. Time for something drastic. My poor doctor was caught a little off guard but I was grateful he took me seriously.
I worry that my boyfriend won't be able to deal with the worse before it gets better thing. Also the mood swings that some go through. He is very chill and has little stressers in his life which can be great, but I worry he is not going to know how to react.
I'm trying to prepare for the dryness now. Lots of moisturizers, water, and lip balm!
Day One Feeling: Anxious
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